Anxiety Update: Depersonalisation & Claustrophobia

Hey Guys Welcome to my Blog, my Name’s Caitlin Maree!

First off something exciting, I CHANGED MY BANNER WHOOO… I’m good, now onto the actual blog post xo

Today I went to school knowing that I wasn’t going to be able to get through the day without coming home. Either because I psyched myself out or because i just wasn’t going to get through the day.

I woke up and felt that feeling that I always dread, one of the things that makes me get so angry at myself… depersonalisation. I haven’t felt this in a loooong time (1-2 months), I was going great and, I knew that. But today, something just I guess, triggered it… and i don’t know what, but knowing the fact I am alive but don’t feel like I am… just annoys me so much.

 


 

”Depersonalisation can consist of a detachment within the self regarding one’s mind or body, or being a detached observer of oneself. Subjects feel they have changed and that the world has become vague, dreamlike, less real, or lacking in significance.”

 


When i came home today, i talked to my nana about how i was feeling… and everything she said all along about me being claustrophobic was correct. So, today i decided to do something which I was dreading look up what it is and what it means.


 

”Claustrophobia is the fear of being enclosed in a small space or room and having no escape. It can be triggered by many situations or stimuli, including elevators crowded to capacity, windowless rooms, small cars and even tight-necked clothing.”

 


I fear of being in rooms with no easy access of escape, or not being at least 3 seats away from the door. I also fear of long dim hallways with no windows, both of which i encounter at school.

So now that i’ve figured out what is really disturbing me, i can tell the person i see about my anxiety and hopefully, soon, find a solution to help the fears.

I just wanted to update you, just incase you were wondering how I was going…

– Caitlin xoxo

New YouTube Channel!

Hey There!

So i’ve been gone for the past few days because i’ve been setting up my new YouTube channel, along with filming and editing my first video! Today i’m going to film a collective haul from the past few months and i will upload it next Sunday. I also will be filming and editing a video everyday next week. I’m doing this because i’ll then have videos for my channel for 6-7 weeks when school goes back. Also, i have all week 2 off next term because there’s a camp and i wont be attending. The camp actually goes for 3 days and 2 nights but that Monday is some holiday in Australia or my State and then theres no point going Tuesday because we won’t be doing anything. This means that i’ll have videos for the next 3 Months! I’m so pumped and motivated to kick off my new channel. If you were previously subscribed to Caitlin Maree please go and subscribe to BeautyBBee.

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In this video i explain why i restarted and tell you quite a bit about me. If you want me to do a Q&A or have any requested videos, please comment them below.

Have a good day!

-Caitlin Maree /BeautyBBee

Anxiety – Expanding your Comfort Zone & Social Anxiety

Hey There!

So today was the second time i went to see my therapist for my stress and anxiety. If you’re new here then please read my previous posts from my ”Anxiety” tab.

So the lesson basically was about expanding your comfort zone. She described it as ”You have a meter, one end is extreme the middle is uncomfortable and the end is comfortable”. Currently i’m in the uncomfortable to extreme, yay me…


The best way to make that comfort zone expand slowly is to do things naturally. Don’t force yourself to breath slowly and hum for a certain amount of seconds, timing is something that drives anxiety and in the two exercises she’s given me she’s told me to do everything in my own speed.

She’s told me to do several things:

  • Ride my bike, for however long i want. She said for not to time myself or say how long i  must ride for, but do it naturally and for as long as i want. Basically, be a free spirit and go with the wind ❤
  • Go to the mall and wear sunglasses, this is for my social anxiety more so. She said to me, ”go to your local mall and sit outside and wear your sunnies, notice how people will glance at you and look at you, but not stare or care. It’s normal for people to look or glance and you’ll find that within this exercise. But what you’ll find, is not what your expecting, no-one will stare or look at you for more then 5 seconds”. If you are suffering from social anxiety, i personally think this exercise would be great ❤

She also said:

Eat something you don’t particularly like, eg for me it’s water with juice, (it just tastes so weird!). Gradually, add more and more water, you start off with a quarter of a cup and then move to half etc.  Over time your comfort zone will expand and you will slowly get use to the taste, this is your comfort zone expanding, this is your brain telling you that you can deal with it and you’re use to it. If you apply this to several other things it makes sense.

Example: School

You need to push yourself, tell yourself ”you are fine” ”you’ve got this” ”you’ve done this before” ”it’s achievable” and positive words. You’d be surprised how well this works. I’m going to apply this for when i’m at school and i’m feeling light headed. Keep pushing yourself to walk and continue to get through the day, if you/ I start to panic ask to take a walk or go to sickbay. I usually doodle small drawings or tap in time to a tempo and tell myself that theres not long till schools over and i can go back to my comfortable bed and computer. I also message my mum, and if i feel like i’m able to fall over and i’m seeing white or feel like i could be sick, i go to sickbay. Though this hasnt’ happened for probably 4-5 weeks, which is great!


That’s all i’ve got to tell you guys today, but, i hope it’s helped or even given you the confidence to try. ALSO, i decided i waned to do a Q&A on here so please ASK QUESTIONS BELOW ❤

Email me on caitlinmareebusiness@gmail.com if you need to talk

– Caitlin xo